To a kindergarten teacher about a child with autism spectrum disorder

Hi!

The conclusion of the inclusive resource centre says that I am not developing in the same way as other children, but I will go to your group. My parents have already told you that I have autism (autism spectrum disorder). This means that I have impairments in social communication, my behaviour is limited and repetitive. It is very difficult for me to accept new things.

Let's get to know each other better.

Tips and ideas to help me get acquainted and adapt:

At the first meeting, I behave worse than usual. All adults want their child to show his or her best side at the first meeting. In addition, for all children, the first meeting causes a lot of anxiety. For me, this is a real challenge. I take unfamiliar surroundings, new people and rules harder than other children.

Getting to know me will be different from other children, because getting to know everything new is difficult for me. I will feel more comfortable if I have my favourite toy or object in my hands. There should be as few new things around as possible (sounds, toys, and people), just you, mom, and me. It is also important that you are more cautious and discreet than usual. I appreciate more distance and a little attention to myself. Then I relax faster and get used to people.

I will gradually get to know the group, adults and children. The first few times I'd rather come when the other kids are already in the group. I'll sit and listen and get used to it. I'm going to sit on a bench in the locker room, please, don't rush me. Then I will start going into the group and get to know the situation and the children.

It is important for me to know where the washbasin, toilet and bedroom are, and to have my own locker, table, chair and bed. Show them to me. Let my desk, wardrobe, and bed be at the edge, not among the children, and have my photo on them. This way I will know for sure that it's Mine and I will feel safe.

Tips and ideas that will help me become more stress-resistant and prevent tantrums:

I will always be a child with special needs. I will learn some social norms and rules, but some peculiarities of my behaviour will remain and you will get used to them. I will sometimes sway and make strange sounds. I will play the way I like, because my game is a pleasure for me. If I try to ban everything, it will be very difficult for me and it can lead to hysteria.

My tantrums can be unexpected. My behaviour may not show that I'm upset or angry, so you won't realize how long my mood has been deteriorating, you'll only see the final chord. Hysteria. Here are some ideas to help you avoid this happen.

All children can be naughty when they want to get the toy they want. However, in my world, there are mega important things for me. My mom knows and will tell me what is very important to me and I can't wait at all, but when I can cope and accept the rules. For example, my world collapses when I see a swing and can't swing on it. Ask the children to take it easy with me. This is how they learn to care about other people. In other cases, I will be able to wait a bit and eventually accept the general rules.

Show me a place where I can be alone when I'm having a hard time. Let me use this recovery space as many times as I need to. Sometimes it's done in the bedroom. You can put down a mat or use my bed. Sometimes you can make a corner for relaxation in the playroom. It's important that it's located at the edge near the wall. Put a blanket there so I can hide. If it's heavy, it will be cool. It calms me down much better. Allow me to take no more than one toy to this place. I'll go back to the common room to play.

Even if I get used to the sounds, I will still get tired of them much faster than other children. I will use headphones. Help me put them on if you see me rocking, hitting my ears and about to throw a tantrum. With time, I'll put on the headphones myself.

Advice and ideas on how to help me develop and learn.

I've been studying for a long time, going to classes with a psychologist and speech therapist, and I've already learned a lot. My parents know what methods and secrets work well with me. Ask them in detail, and we will be able to do this too.

I understand pictures better than language. Use additional means of communication (pictures) to communicate and teach new things.

To learn something new, I need to do it several times. All children learn by imitating and copying adults and each other. That's not how I learn. Sometimes you need to do a new action several times with my hand to make me understand what I need to do. Sometimes one attempt with my hand is enough, and sometimes a word of advice is enough. Hand in hand is also a hint.

Use a minimal hint. That is, first try verbal, and then more intense (do it with my hand). One thing: remember, I'm wary of touching, so don't do it without getting to know me well. When I "make friends" with you and recognize your hands, I will accept help.

I need help with switching and adding new details to the game. If I dwell on something, it's bad. Then I don't develop. I like to spin the wheel, so add useful ideas to this game: fast, spin, slow, stop. And the further you go, the more elements you can add to such a game.

Let me participate in the festivities. I don't like loud music, I can watch the kids, sometimes even with headphones on. Don't isolate me, I'll get used to it over time. I can learn and recite a fairly long poem, or repeat movements in a dance.

Pay attention to my strengths and talents. I'm very attentive and memorize very well. I can find differences in pictures and tell where a geometric shape is. Ask me about it.

My development is not only your responsibility, my teacher. I have an individual development plan and it lists the specialists and classes I need. A psychologist and a speech therapist work with me. They have specialized knowledge. You can discuss and consult with them! Together, you can do much more than you can do separately.

Tips and ideas on how to get to know the children in the group.

Your comments out loud help us understand each other and myself. Other children do not understand me, and I do not understand other children. You explain the rules to me, and my behaviour is need to be explained to them. Why I sometimes cover my ears, why I play in other ways, why I wave my arms. For example, when I start acting strangely, say it out loud: "You're waving your arms because you're having fun," or "It's loud in here, I'll help you put on your headphones," or "You're tired, you need to rest."

My game will never be like the games of other children. We can play in different ways. All the children play role-playing games with each other. The girls play "hairdressing", imagining themselves as adult masters. I enjoy touching the doll's hair and get upset if it is tangled. The boys play with cars, imagine themselves as drivers and superheroes. And I like to watch the wheels turn.

Tell at the first parent-teacher conference that I will be attending our group. Parents of other children may be against it at first, because they may be afraid that I will be unpredictable and teach their children to behave badly. My parents will tell them about me, my hobbies, my difficulties, and my diagnosis, too. They speak in simple words, know the main things and can share them with others. When my parents tell about me, other moms and dads will think of me as just a kid, not a danger.

In the kindergarten, I will be able to learn simple but very important things for life. You might think, why do I need a kindergarten if it's so hard for me? I, like everyone else, will live in a world of people and it's important for me to learn how to cope with difficulties and communicate. Share with other children or insist on sharing with them. Being in noisy places, being without a mother, asking for help and demonstrating success, talking to different people, dressing, eating, and much more. Children learn more easily at a young age, so it's important for me to get this experience in kindergarten. I can also meet sympathetic and patient people who will understand that I can do a lot, that sometimes it's difficult for me and that I need help. After such a meeting, it's much easier for me to believe other strangers and I want to make new acquaintances.

With all this experience, I will then go into adulthood!

A little afterword:)

It is very possible that a child with similar difficulties will be in our group, but his mother will not say that he or she has ASD. Maybe she doesn't know about this herself. Or perhaps she has difficulty speaking about this issue. You shouldn't tell this mom about difficulties and the diagnosis. But my tips will also help in communicating with this child. And it's great.